Celebrating Special Interests: Baking Cakes and Parenting Neurodivergent Kids

When parenting neurodivergent kids, we have wonderful opportunities to celebrate and support their special interests. In this post, we explore one such celebration – with cake!

In our house, birthdays come with a special tradition: cakes become an outlet for creativity, imagination, and whatever my kids are most passionate about that year.

My kids are neurodivergent, and their interests are wonderfully specific. One year it’s a plecostomus fish, the next a four-armed sloth monster. Whatever it is, their imaginations inspire me, and I do my best to bring their ideas to life in cake form.

The results? Sweet, sometimes messy, occasionally slumped over. But each cake teaches me something new – just like parenting does when I follow my kids' lead, embrace their strengths, and meet them where they are.

Every Cake Tells a Story: From Big Wins to Sweet Fails

Not every cake turns out the way I imagined. But each one tells a story. And sometimes, they turn out pretty awesome.

One year, a plecostomus named Big Al inspired a well-loved cake. Big Al lives in our aquarium, and one of my kids is completely captivated by him, especially the way he sucks on the glass. Weird-looking but undeniably cool, Big Al made a fun cake muse.

Big Al in all his fondant glory.

And Big Al wasn’t the only muse. Over the years, we’ve brought all kinds of characters to life.

Another hit? The Star Wars Sarlacc cake, complete with tentacles wrapped around Boba Fett just as requested by a nine-year-old, who had watched all nine of the main films (several times), The Mandalorian, and The Book of Boba Fett. The force is definitely strong in my youngest.

Then there was the alien monster with "lots" of eyes – a vision a five-year-old dreamed up. Recreating it took some planning, and the chocolate chip cookie dough truffle eyeballs were a hit (and disappeared quickly).

During our The Nightmare Before Christmas phase, Jack Skellington had to make an appearance. I made this cake before I knew fondant was a thing (thank you, Nailed It!). Jack’s icing-based head wasn’t exactly polished, but my youngest adored it, specially the edible chocolate bow tie, which matched his own bow tie love at the time.

Three of our favorite cakes — made to celebrate my kids' love of Star Wars, monsters, and all things Jack Skellington. (Yes, the chocolate bowtie was eaten.)

Cookie Monster didn’t make it to the party... but we tried.

Of course, not every cake is a win.

Take the Cookie Monster cake — a request from a three-year-old. Let’s just say it crumbled. Literally. We ended up making a last-minute grocery store run for a backup sheet cake.

Then there was the 1960s box TV cake. It should have been easy. Instead, it came out looking like a demon with horns. We added a happy face and called it a day. My son? He still loved it.

Even the next day, when the cake slumped forward, he found it hilarious.

And that cake mattered.

It represented his passion for the evolution of technology – a subject he explores and shares with us often.

He taught me all about Philo Farnsworth, the boy who invented TV. Before that, I’d never heard of Philo.

But now, thanks to my son, Philo's a household name. Sure, he’s not a caped superhero, but a scientific innovator is cool to celebrate.

The 1960s box TV cake that morphed into a smiling, horned demon — and still got a thumbs-up.

And one of my favorite challenges? A four-armed sloth monster with a Tiki mask – a creature my son became fascinated with after glimpsing it in Moana’s underworld. That brief moment sparked stories, sketches, conversations, and imaginative scenarios about what the monster could be like.

Inspired by a creature glimpsed in Moana’s underworld — a four-armed sloth monster with a Tiki mask, reimagined in cake.

We brainstormed cake ideas together, tweaked the design, and I gave it my best shot.

Was it perfect? Of course not. Was it weird and wonderful? Absolutely.

Why Special Interests Matter

In our family, special interests aren’t obsessions – they’re passions. They’re how our kids connect with the world, soak up knowledge, and shine in ways that are uniquely their own.

(For more on how a special interest in Josh Groban's music supported my son's development, read this story).

Whether it’s researching Philo Farnsworth or exploring the history of LEGO, these interests lead to deep dives and meaningful conversations that we all grow from.

Baking a cake based on my kids' special interests is my way of saying: I see you, I celebrate you, and I love what lights you up.

Parenting Neurodivergent Kids: Celebrating Special Interests One Cake at a Time

Not every cake stands up straight.

But every cake stands for something that matters.

Each one draws me closer to my kids as I listen more to their special interests, strengthening our connection through the messy, magical process of growing and creating together.

Connecting through special interests and sweet moments — this one was all about Sonic.

Years later, it’s not the perfect cakes I remember. It’s the sparkle in my kids’ eyes, the laughter when a cake collapses, and the joy of turning their imagination into something sweet and real.

For families parenting neurodivergent kids, celebrating special interests – even through something as simple as a cake – is a joyful way to connect, honor, and celebrate who our kids truly are.

Jen with Cool Wiring